Ever since Richard Nixon introduced it to American politics, the October Surprise has become nearly as traditional a strategy as the November Election.

So it’s natural to assume Trump has one. But what if it’s Trump?

Think about it. Pumpkin Jesus is nothing if keenly attuned to viewership, shares and ratings. And even he has to see that his choice for vice president has gone over like a wet fart in an elevator.

J.D. Vance may preach the MAGA gospel, but he’s got none of the pastor’s hell and brimstone. He has the smarmy smile of a used car dealer, and his cat lady jabs are landing with the force of one.

Do we really think Donnie can keep a partnership for 100 days, particularly after the last one turned on him and upheld the Constitution? He slept with Stormy while his wife was pregnant. He’s never been the paragon of patience.

There is nothing Constitutionally that says a president must stick with a VP choice, right up to the election. If Vance’s public image toilet flush clogs the drain, what’s to stop the man who rose to power on the phrase “You’re fired” from dipping back into the classics as decision time nears?

The strategy would be unthinkable for anyone except Trump, whose erratic behavior must be catnip for conservatives. They would praise the Hail Mary as 3D chess, and the 24/7s would revive the hysteria currently being heaped on Kamala Harris — a news fixation that you know must drive America’s Hitler bonkers.

All the more reason to be wary of Donnie pulling rugs from his own feet. If I’m a Dem strategist, I’ve got a break-glass contingency in case fat baby Jesus announces that he’s heard from GOP women and Nikki Haley is his new VP.

You know, to make America super great again.