“A rare, two headed snake was discovered in Florida today when a cat dragged it into a Palm Beach home. Said the homeowner: Gah! Get that cat outta here!” — Seth Meyers

This site occasionally teases that dogs are better than cats, usually because of jokes like the one Myers told last night.

It’s just too easy. If a meteor unleashed a virus that ballooned domestic pets to the size of Buicks, goldfish would hog pools, hamsters would consume couches, and cats would shred us like mama grizzlies. With dogs, your biggest threat would be slobber drownings. That and concern that dogs hump only your leg.

But in all honesty, as I begin to brush the cobwebs from my windshield to start looking toward a new companion, I wish adopting a cat were an option. Because one of the coolest I ever met has befriended me.

Alas, I can’t own a feline because of the transplant. The immunocompromised and pregnant are strongly discouraged from cat ownership because of the lethal risk of toxoplasmosis, a nasty organism that lives only in cat feces.

That’s a shame, because the truth is, when a cat loves you the way a dog does, it can be more of a dopamine rush.

I realized this after meeting a diminutive Siamese with what feels like a broken tail. She’s a tiny thing, as light as a sparrow. But she isn’t shy about being pet, and will drive her head forcibly into your hand to commence her massage. It’s wonderful.

Esme loved being pet, too. She would hop on the couch (when her legs worked), and sprawl against your side, exposing a pink, bulbous belly that demanded attention.

It was unfailingly, unfathomably adorable. But it came with a price: She farted like a diesel truck engine, and her many bumps and warts made her look like an upended frog. The Siamese, on the other hand, is all petting pleasure, without the silent-but-deadlies.

And cats just feel better. Like a stuffed animal coming to life to huddle with you, but with a warmer, softer coat. The sound of a content cat purring is like hearing a perfectly-tuned violin.

I’m sure I will still joke about the evolutionary differences between wolf and mountain lion progeny. And the fact remains: Feline fanatics will boast about their cats being dog-like; canine connoisseurs don’t brag about their dogs being cat-like.

And I remain a dog guy. Through the windshield, I’m beginning to make out the prospects of a new live-in: tiny roommates; gigantic ones; siblings; duos, entire families.

But the truth about cats and dogs is this: They’re best when they’re a little bit of both.