Suddenly, this all makes sense.

Donnie Dullard left reporters flabbergasted today when he announced that he was cancelling his trip to Denmark after that nation not take his offer to buy Greenland seriously.

“Denmark is a very special country with incredible people, but based on Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen’s comments, that she would have no interest in discussing the purchase of Greenland, I will be postponing our meeting scheduled in two weeks for another time,” Trump fat-pecked from his iPhone Tuesday night. He must have used the transcription function on the phone, or had an aide type it. No way Littlefinger could have managed to tweet that on his own, as he spelled Frederiksen’s name correctly.

But he couldn’t help but play the fool in the news conference that followed. He called the PM’s rejection rude and undiplomatic. He took particular offense that she apparently remarked the offer was “absurd.” “She wasn’t calling me absurd,” the Simpleton-in-Chief bellowed. “She was calling the United States absurd.”

Come again? For one thing, we are absurd. We put you behind the nation’s steering wheel, dumbass. Secondly, in an interview with a Danish newspaper, Frederiksen explained why she turned down Mr. Blubber. “Greenland is not Danish,” she clarified. “Greenland belongs to Greenland. I strongly hope that this is not meant seriously.”

We say the same thing to ourselves every day, Mette. Sadly, it was meant seriously, as Trumptards take everything their president says (see El Paso for reference). The New York Times ran a headline today noting the “Bewilderment and Anger” among Danes and diplomats alike over Trump’s spurned advances. The anger is understandable. But the bewilderment can be settled quickly, with an Associated Press story that ran earlier this week, and a Trump maneuver run earlier this year.

This week, the AP ran a story explaining that “Greenland is where Earth’s refrigerator door is left open, where glaciers dwindle and seas begin to rise.” The story went on to explain that New York University’s air and ocean scientists have tracked Greenland as the spot to best calculate global warming and climate change. And their findings are horrifying.

“It is so warm at Helheim Glacier, just inside the Arctic Circle, that on an August day, coats are left on the ground and (scientists) work on the watery melting ice without gloves,” the article said. “In one of the closest towns, Kulusuk, the morning temperature reached a shirtsleeve 52 degrees.  The ice they are standing on is thousands of years old. It will be gone within a year or two, adding yet more water to rising seas worldwide.

“Summer this year is hitting Greenland hard with record-shattering heat and extreme melt,” it continued. “By the end of the summer, about 400 billion metric tons of ice — maybe more — will have melted or calved off Greenland’s giant ice sheet, scientists estimate. That is enough water to flood Greece a third of a meter deep.”

That’s pretty irrefutable evidence, though Donnie is doing his darnedest to refute it. Remember, in March, he appointed the twit William Happer as head of a “presidential advisory committee” on global warming.

Trump tried to name it “The Federal Committee on Climate Security”– until he learned that, under law, federal committees must include “open meetings, chartering, public involvement, and reporting.” And that doesn’t jibe with Trump’s assertion that global warming is a Chinese hoax.

It does, however, jibe with the president’s desire to squelch scientific data. Turning Greenland into a massive real estate purchase would allow him more control over who is allowed onto the oil-rich Arctic plot. Why permit pesky scientists there when you can replace them with GOP-friendly fossil fuel interests?

Sorry, Donald. Greenland ain’t on the market. America does, however, have a bridge in Brooklyn we can sell you. Feel free to take a flying leap off it.