Category Archives: The Everyman Chronicles

The Word Worth a Thousand Photos

(Part of an occasional series, because, well, most fuckers don’t deserve the headlines they get.)

 

Ronan Mattin doesn’t say much. But in these bloviated days…Maybe just enough, in fact.

See, Ronan is autistic. Or on the spectrum. Or however we’re limbo-ing around words we’re unable to admit we live, let alone utter: Ronan is sick, so infirmed he rarely communicates with words. I became so enamored of Ronan I looked up local Boston-area TV stations who interviewed the 9-year-old.

Or tried to interview him. Whenever a stranger asked him a question, Ronan would put his forefinger to his thumb, forming a circle he’d place on his lower lip. As if his hand was closing the lock to his mouth. But he was an adorable kid, never losing the smile or earnest head nod. But never speaking, either.

During one interview, Ronan’s grandfather put on classical music. The lock dropped away. The mouth opened into into a smile that make emoticons jealous. He ran to his grandfather’s lap to look at the classical album he began. “That’s how he communicates,” grandad said.

The grandfather had taken his progeny last week to see The Handel & Haydn Society, which had just finished its rendition of Mozart’s “Masonic Funeral” at Boston’s Symphony Hall. As the piece settled to its conclusion, Ronan could not help but blurt loudly:  “WOW!”

Boston classical music station WCRB-FM, which was recording the concert,  captured the exuberance on audio. The crowd can be heard bursting first into laughter and then rousing applause for the child. “That actually brought me to tears,” said concertgoer Mary Jane Leach, of Valley Falls, New York.

The Handel Society (America’s oldest performing arts group) launched a viral “Find the WOW Child” campaign, which quickly did. The Handel Society introduced Ronan to Harry Christophers, the society’s artistic director who was conducting the night of the performance. They then handed kid and grandpa a pair of tickets where the two would be the guest of honor.

The lock circle had returned to Ronan’s mouth by the time he took the tickets from Christophers. Granddad put a gentle hand to Ronan’s head. “What do we say when someone does something nice?”

“Thank you,” Ronan eked.

Doesn’t say much. Just enough, in fact.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRhgERhMcGg

Havlicek Stole the Ball!

Image result for john havlicek

Living in LA, I know this is heresy, but fuck it. Heretics are some of my favorite sinners. And this is my heretical confession: Celtic blood runs through my veins.

And my blood ran a little cold yesterday; John Havlicek died.John Havliceck, Boston Celtics, 1960s.jpg

I never saw Havlicek play a game in his life. But, in many ways, Havlicek, nicknamed “Hondo,” bonded me with my father. He would tell me stories of the Celtics in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s, when they were perhaps the most successful professional sports team in history, regardless of sport. Bill Russell, Bob Cousy, Jo Jo White, Dave Cowens and John Havlicek made up their core, and dad would spend hours telling me stories of their unselfish heroism. And the Celts had the record to prove it: They won eight straight world championships from 1959 to 1966, and 12 out of 18 through 1976. Image result for Bill Russell, Bob Cousy, Tiny Archibald, Dave Cowens and John Havlicek

As I got older, my fandom intensified. Larry Bird became my Havlicek. Image result for larry bird Though we lived in Detroit, we had a hifi system the size of a Buick. On clear night, we could hear Boston games as relayed by WBZ commentator Johnny Most, a guy whose voice sounded like he gargled with vinegar and gravel. Many a night, bedtime required I turn in before the game ended. Every morning, dad would leave an index card on the kitchen table for me, with the game’s outcome and players’ stats. I may even have become a journalist to bond with dad, but that’s another story.

My favorite of dad’s stories centered on Hondo and the pick-and-roll. A pick-and-roll is when a defender is covering you too closely to get a shot off. So Havlicek would dribble as fast as he could past a big teammate, usually Russell or Cowens, who acted as a human barricade for Hondo. Havlicek would pass a teammate so closely their shoulders would brush, sending the inattentive defender careening into the monstrous men — and the floor. Today’s players use the move to clear a path for a flashy, ESPN-friendly dunk. Hondo, though, would simply leap for an unimpeded jump shot. “You’ve never seen someone pick-and-roll like Havlicek,” dad would say. “It was a thing of beauty.”Image result for cownens and havlicek

And devastation. Hondo would collect more hardware over his career than a carpenter: eight championship rings, 13 All-Star Games, inducted into the NBA’s 50 greatest ball players of all time. Oh, and he was drafted by the NFL’s Cleveland Browns, too, but took a less concussive path.

And he didn’t even start most games. Coach Red Auerbach would use Havlicek as a reserve as a sort of psychological torture: Can you imagine busting your ass chasing the starting Celtics for 10 minutes — only to see Havlicek take the court, fresh as a daisy? Russell, who owns 11 championship rings, calls him the most versatile player he’s ever seen. Four years after he retired, the NBA created the Sixth Man Award, to recognize great role players off the bench. Though the NBA won’t admit it, I’m convinced the award exists because of Havlicek.

Alas, he could not pick-and-roll Parkinson’s, which claimed him at 79 last night.

In honor of the man, I suggest two tributes. One, that the NBA officially change the name of the 6th Man Award to the John Havlicek Award. Shit, the award can even be informally shortened to winning a Hondo. Think of what that would mean to a bench player, to share such company.

The second is personal. I’ve never been a sports memorabilia person. When I worked the cop beat, an FBI agent told me at least 85% of autographs are forged. But if I ever happen into a shop and find Hondo’s playing card, or authentically-signed jersey, or come across a ball with his verifiable signature, I’m gonna do something different at the cash register.

Pick and roll.

Under Darkness of M. Night

 

M. Night Shyamalan’s career is something akin to the stock market. After making his Hollywood splash with the Oscar-nominated chiller The Sixth Sense, he was hailed on the cover of Newsweek as the next Steven Spielberg. But since then, his career has seen as many peaks and valleys as The Dow Jones. In anticipation of his trilogy capper Glass, we take a look and rank the dozen films in his career.

anes The Last Airbender (2010)The Last Airbender

Shyamalan had a reputation of making tight suspense movies that didn’t break the bank: His first seven movies cost less than $75 million. Maybe that’s what made Airbender so disappointing. Despite boasting a $150 million budget, the movie was marked with uninspired performance, shoddy special effects and a script devoid of his trademark flourishes of quiet tension — a far cry from the wildly wildly imaginative Nickelodeon series on which it was based. Savage reviews sealed the movie’s fate — and Shyamalan’s plans for a trilogy.

Lady in the Water (2006)Lady in the Water

One of the biggest disappointments of Shyamalan’s career. Before beginning production on this  fairy tale,  Shyamalan had quite a resume,  with Sense, Unbreakable and Signs under his belt. And with a cast lead by Paul Giamatti, Bryce Dallas Howard and Jeffrey Wright, expectations were stratospheric. Alas, this story about a blue collar Joe trying to save a stranded water faerie return home came off as an exercise in self-indulgent hubris, and sank like a stone with critics and fans.

Praying With Anger (1992)Praying With Anger

While not technically a Hollywood film (Shyamalan started working on his debut film  while still a student at NYU), this was his first true movie: He wrote, produced, funded, directed, and starred in the story of an Americanized young man of East Indian descent returning home to rediscover his roots. While the movie didn’t have the low-budget Blair Witch or El Mariachi debut effect he hoped (the pacing was molasses slow and it showed Shyamalan, who played the lead, is no actor), it did grab the attention of studio execs who saw potential, opening the door for  Sense.

After Earth (2013)After Earth

Credit Shyamalan with guts: Even after the costly debacle that was  Airbender,  Shyamalan wasn’t shy about swinging for the big-budget fences, and Columbia Pictures obliged with  a $130 million budget and Will Smith for this sci-fi adventure. But the story of space travelers stranded on an alien planet played as an empty vessel, a vanity project for Smith and his son Jaden, who showed a surprising lack of chemistry and could not muster, of all things, much emotion to overcome the unimpressive special effects. While star power and overseas grosses helped the movie turn a small profit, the movie never took flight with fans and reviewers.

The Happening (2008)The Happening

Despite a terrific trailer, Happening became a Hollywood punchline about wind being an awful casting choice for a thriller. The story about a teacher, his wife and their friends trying to outrun a mysterious plague has its fans, but primarily among B-movie fans fond of it’s unintentional B-movie quality.

Wide Awake(1998)Wide Awake

Most people don’t even know Rosie O’Donnell starred in a Shyamalan film, but this clunker about a fifth grader who sets off on a search for God after the death of his grandfather is unfortunate proof otherwise. While the movie should have been in the wheelhouse of Shyamalan’s themes of faith, family and identity, the story was too plodding and schmaltzy to get the director back on top of his game.

The Visit (2015)M. Night Shyamalan The Visit

After his fourth straight big-budget misfire in After Earth,  Shyamalan seemed poised for a possible comeback with this 2015 semi found-footage film about teen siblings visiting their grandparents and finding them engaged in some seriously deranged behavior. Too deranged for audiences, who found the movie  claustrophobic, paranoid and just plain bizarre — made more confusingly jittery by the movie’s handheld camera work.  It did, though, earn a 72% on RottenTomatoes and gave  a glimpse into the creepy anxiousness Shyamalan would use so effectively in Split.

The Village (2004)The Village

Perhaps the most underrated film in Shymalan’s oeuvre. Sure, the central conceit is a cheap twist with no clever foreshadowing clues like Sense.  But the mournful story and Gothic themes of grief, fear and the coldness of modern society made for an effective chiller, accentuated by the woods that made up the set and the “creature” that haunted them. Not to mention, it featured Roger Deakins haunting cinematography and a terrific romantic score from James Newton Howard. The movie enjoyed a healthy home video run and warrants a repeat viewing for those expecting something different in theaters.

Split (2017)James McAvoy in Split

While The Visit didn’t quite put Shyamalan back on top,  it proved Shyamalan was ready to tackle the darker, deeper themes that made him a critical darling early in his career. Backed by the risk-taking production house Blumhouse, this story of a man suffering from multiple personalities was a showcase for James McAvoy’s incredible range with voices and characters, and is perhaps the most unexpected entry of a suspense trilogy in recent cinema. It’s a wonderful examination of psychological horror and was the surprise commercial hit of 2017, raking in $138 million, more than three times its budget. It’s also made Glass the most anticipated film of winter.

Signs (2002)M. Night Shyamalan Signs

Sure, it’s too long, and critics had a field day with the twist ending (why would invading aliens, who dissolve in water, invade a planet that’s 70% water and rains regularly?). But Signs became not only a sci-fi masterpiece, but it pulled off the near-impossible at the box office: After dropping from the No. 1 perch its opening weekend, it roared back in its fourth weekend to hold the top spot for three straight,  raking in $227 million by the end of its run. Many consider it Mel Gibson’s finest performance, and made a scene-stealer out of Joaquin Phoenix. It also became that true Hollywood rarity: a religious parable to wear its heart on its sleeve.

Unbreakable (2000)Samuel L. Jackson in Unbreakable

Perhaps the most underrated superhero film in modern Hollywood memory. Coming on the heels of Sense with a cryptic trailer and a shroud of secrecy, Unbreakable set an unreachable bar of expectations, and its $95 million at the box office — $5 million short of the ridiculous $100 million “blockbuster” label requirement — had some media wonks deeming it a disappointment. But it’s eminently re-watchable for the clues it subtly lays out, the sequel-friendly landscape it carves, and still stands as some of the best work Bruce Willis and Samuel L. Jackson have ever done. It’s even got the subtle heart of a family drama, virtually unheard of in today’s superhero universe.

The Sixth Sense (1999)Haley Joel Osment and Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense

Even Shyamalan could not come up with an unexpected twist to this list. What more can be said about a debut that challenges Orson Welles’? Shyamalan’s tale of a soft-spoken 10-year-old who sees dead people comes off as a straightforward horror movie. But the mesmerizing performance of Oscar-nominated Haley Joel Osment, played against Bruce Willis’ wonderfully restrained performance and capped by the confident directing of a Tinsel Town wunderkind, made Sense not only the suspense thriller of the year, but the decade. No matter how many times you watch it, you’ll find a new, subtle clue hinting at its devastating finale.