Open Letter to A Puppy: Geronimo!


Shively My scofflaws,

San Pedro Well, I hope you’re happy. 

Today, a friend and I disassembled the hefty wooden bed that’s been my nocturnal cabin for a decade and a half. The reason?

Your stumpy legs, Charlie. 

Don’t get me wrong; I love your low-rider suspension — in no small part because your six-inch legs don’t impair your hops at all. You can outleap Jadie.

But you bound so eagerly from the bed’s waist-high precipice, clatter so loudly on impact, I just know you’re gonna break a bone on a cold, old morning. Then again, perhaps your old man is taking about himself again.

Regardless, what’s done is done. The guest bedroom is gonna have a killer setup once I find a mattress, box spring, and sucker to drive us. You know anyone?

In the meantime, get used to fewer nighttime acrobatics. You’ll thank me in the long run. Besides, I’M the one sleeping on the floor. That’s your normal bed.

Anyway, like I said, I hope you’re happy. Honestly, I’m kinda am.

Glide On, Mocha


Moby Dick was never actually named Moby Dick in the story.

In Herman Melville’s 1851 novel, the giant white sperm whale is referred to simply as “the White Whale” or “Moby Dick” by the crew, but that name really comes from Captain Ahab’s obsession with it.

The real-world inspiration was a famous 19th-century albino sperm whale called Mocha Dick, known to sailors for his ferocity. Melville changed the name slightly, but in the book itself, the whale isn’t walking around with “Moby Dick” as an official name; it’s more a label born of Ahab’s vendetta and the crew’s legend-making.