Category Archives: Fang & Claw

Worth It


Ancient Egyptians are often said to have worshipped cats. They didn’t — though it is accurate to say their felines were beloved and pampered, sometimes bedazzled in gold accessories, and occasionally allowed to eat directly from dinner plates at meals. Cats first made their appearance in Fertile Crescent farming communities around 8,000 years ago, and they initially earned their keep as household protectors from rodents, snakes, and scorpions. Eventually, the Egyptians grew to see cats’ protectiveness and companionship as the same traits held by their deities, particularly Bastet, a goddess often depicted as a cat or lion who was honored with temples and pilgrimages. All in all, the Egyptians bonded so well with their cat companions that they mourned their pets after death, and both cat owners and family members would publicly express their grief by shaving off their eyebrows. Some historians believe that the mourning period lasted until a new set of eyebrows grew in (which could be as long as three or four months).

The ancient Egyptians are often credited with domesticating felines, though in 2004, archaeologists found a 9,500-year-old cat buried in Cyprus — suggesting cats may have been living alongside humansearlier than previously thought. Still, Egyptians likely helped transform cats from the tiny, wild creatures they once were to the lazy furballs we now snuggle with; some historians believe the Egyptians selectively bred housecats, helping their numbers flourish and giving them the temperaments we now enjoy (or at least tolerate) today.

Time to open an off-leash cat park? You know, with a catnip bar.

Open Letter to A Puppy: Name Change

From the archives but never here:

July 29, 2020

From: The Dept. of Canine Renaming and Redundancy Dept.

To: JayDee Barkinger Bowles

Dear Ms. Bowles,

Your application for a spell-change to your first name has been approved to Jadie.

However, your application to drop your last name has been denied, as has your application for the personalized plate Dane Jadie Clench. And please tell your brother there’s no such thing as a “Disservice Dog.”