Monthly Archives: October 2020

The Wonderbra Theory of Technology

Wonderbra Print Advert By Aap Eet Banaan: wOnderBra | Ads of the World™

I don’t know shit about economics, and know even less about bras. But I’ve been seeing a lot in the news lately about the puzzling vigor of the U.S. stock market during the pandemic, and I have a possible explanation: It’s the WonderBra Theory of Technology.

It posits this: All technology lifts and separates, like the underwire push-up.

First, let’s tackle the “lift” component. Technology requires that human kind is able to elevate, across the spectrum: Higher speeds, higher memory capacity, increased distances, further depths, longer reaches, etc. We could literally see this being birthed in The Space Race, from 1957 to 1975.

Space Race Diary | American Experience | Official Site | PBS

Now for the “separate,” which is a bit less obvious, but hear me out. I propose that every technological advancement in modern U.S. history has had a separating effect on the culture. Consider:

  • When radio was invented in 1895, Americans no longer had to congregate to share an oral history. We could instead stay at home for radio theater or ball games, for instance.
Old Time Radio Theater
  • When television was invented in 1925, the insulating effect was even more pronounced. Why go to a play when you can see a TV show? Why go to a movie when you can do Netflix? On a personal level, we all know the frightening amount of time we spent(d) secluded in front of the boob tube. There’s a reason for the term couch potato.
Are We Nearing the End of the Couch Potato Era? | NCTA — The Internet &  Television Association
  • The advent of social media in 1997, with the website Six Degrees, hermetically sealed the American population in our technology cocoons. The ability to work, date, shop and essentially exist within a string of 1s and 0s helped create a social landscape of divots. We have created personalized echo chambers that resonate our confirmation biases like a holler in a canyon.
394 Empty Bleachers Stock Videos and Royalty-Free Footage - iStock

The same can be said for almost all technological advances; electricity nullified the need to gather around heat; the telegraph eliminated the reliance on personal correspondence; better automotive technology allowed us to live further and further from home.

And, for better or worse, we’re seeing the same effect on our economy, and in the stock market in particular. Last month, U.S. News & World Report published a piece on how stocks are faring so well when the economy is faltering so dramatically. The magazine said:

“A few enormous and prosperous companies are behind the upward trend of the stock market. Recently, profits have been concentrated in a few tech companies that hold near-monopoly status, such as Amazon. and other ‘FANG stocks'” (Facebook, Apple, Amazon, Netscape, Google).

So how long is our underwear going to support? Anyone’s guess. But as much as we love to curse the rise of social media and bemoan our collective addiction to cellular telephones, let’s not forget that the Wonderbra did the job we designed it to do.

Yes, technology fostered the fractured and divisive political climate we now call home. But the lift-and-separate mechanics of technology may yet save our hides. From schools to sports to socializing, from hugs to handshakes to a pat on the back, what is so unsettling about these times is that we’re learning just how much human interaction we can live without.

The Great Brain Freeze

Breaking Bad: Why Walter White Left Gray Matter | Screen Rant

In honor of National Train Your Brain Day, we offer a wrinkly gray FactSlaps, Walter White remix:

  • Lack of oxygen in the brain for 5 to 10 minutes results in permanent brain damage.
Lack of oxygen in the brain for 5 to 10 minutes results in permanent damage.
  • Your brain keeps developing until your late 40s.

New brain connections are created every time you form a memory.

16 Cool Facts About Your Brain You Should Definitely Know - Art-Sheep
  • Your brain uses 20% of the total oxygen and blood in your body.
  • There’s a virus that attacks human DNA making people less intelligent, impairing brain activity, learning and memory.
Inside the Brain
  • When awake, the human brain produces enough electricity to power a small light bulb.
National Medals on Twitter: "When awake, the human brain produces enough  electricity to power a small light bulb. #UseYourHead… "
  • Violent homes have the same effect on children’s brains as combat on soldiers.
amdavadis4ever Let us Talk About Your Brain for a Moment… | A I R I E F  Website
  • You have taste receptors in the stomach, intestines, pancreas, lungs, anus, testicles and the brain.
You have taste receptors in the stomach, intestines, pancreas, lungs, anus,  testicles, and the brain. - ViralServ
  • The human brain has the same consistency as tofu.
  • The smell of chocolate increases theta brain waves, which triggers relaxation.
Facts on Chocolate | Unknown Chocolate Facts | FunBuzzzTime Focus Keyword:  Chocolate
  • Forgetting is good for the brain: Deleting unnecessary information helps the nervous system retain its plasticity.
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