Monthly Archives: September 2020

R.I.P., R.B.G


Mushrooms

Overnight, very
Whitely, discreetly,
Very quietly

Our toes, our noses
Take hold on the loam,
Acquire the air.

Nobody sees us,
Stops us, betrays us;
The small grains make room.

Soft fists insist on
Heaving the needles,
The leafy bedding,

Even the paving.
Our hammers, our rams,
Earless and eyeless,

Perfectly voiceless,
Widen the crannies,
Shoulder through holes. We

Diet on water,
On crumbs of shadow,
Bland-mannered, asking

Little or nothing.
So many of us!
So many of us!

We are shelves, we are
Tables, we are meek,
We are edible,

Nudgers and shovers
In spite of ourselves.
Our kind multiplies:

We shall by morning
Inherit the earth.
Our foot’s in the door.

— Sylvia Plath

The Software Error of ‘The Social Dilemma’

The Social Dilemma is a terrifying look at what tech engineers have done to make social media a deadly addiction. So it’s more than a little ironic the film couldn’t make itself more arresting.

That’s not to say the new Netflix documentary isn’t interesting and, at times, enlightening and downright terrifying. Directed by Jeff Orlowski (Chasing Coral), Dilemma dutifully examines the retardation effect of social media: YouTubers peddling conspiracies; dolts informing themselves with Facebook news feeds; cell phone junkies fixing from the toilet.

Dilemma goes a layer deeper, collecting the tech wizards who helped create Silicon Valley titans such as Google, YouTube, FaceBook, Instagram, Twitter, etc. They tell a Frankensteinian story of their gambit with Artificial Intelligence, in which they literally turned AI on themselves — and the world at large — with no idea the outcome.

Too bad the film is loaded with needless dramatizations to illustrate its points, as if producers decided the old, Ken Burns-style of non-fiction filmmaking (interviews, real people, news footage) needed a software update.

It didn’t, and the film suffers for it.

Which is a shame, because Dilemma has some doozie anecdotes. Like when early engineers talk of programming AI to keep readers locked on screens, even if it meant feeding them fake news. Or the engineer who came up with the idea to allow users to “tag” and alert other users that they’ve been named in a social media post, making it impossible to resist.

The most enthralling, though, is the Faustian bargain engineers made with AI. Technicians talk of giving AI a simple goal in their social media strategy, similar to teaching a computer to play chess. In this case, they programmed AI to send alluring alerts to social media users in dopamine- dosed chimes and crimson notifications.

Even technicians admitted they underestimated AI’s learning curve, and have had to battle their own addictions to mobile devices.

“If it’s free,” an engineer flatly says of social media (and its itinerant games, apps and services), “you’re the product.”

The Social Dilemma — this is how the world ends | Financial Times
Social media architects after Congressional testimony.

So how did Netflix let this gem slip through its fingers? Namely, with its silly and necessary stage flourishes. Instead of sticking with interviews, Dilemma assigns actors to play some of the engineers (and their families). It even has an actor to play Jaron Lanier, considered the godfather of virtual reality. He’s more striking than the actor playing him, and the drama undercuts Lanier’s insight.

Lanier blowing into a woodwind instrument with several chambers
The real Jaron Lanier

Most egregiously, though, is Dilemma‘s portrayal of AI, here played by actor Vincent Kartheiser. Kartheiser was vanity embodied wonderfully in Mad Men. Here, though, he plays a cartoonish virtual villain, pudgy and merciless like a rabid Wizard of Oz.

Vincent Kartheiser - Rotten Tomatoes

It not quite enough to make Dilemma unwatchable. The details are too damning too ignore. But for a story about the unrelenting threat of a burgeoning computer threat, Dilemma could have used more of a human touch.

A Roze by Any Other Name is Still Misspelt

As if the politica weren’t evidence enough, the case for spell-check:

crushed peppers container reading cruch papers
Even better than their other pizza topping, paperonly.
Cream cheese container reading "cheam creems"
Great on a bagel, but try the locks.
ketchup bottle reading ketchap
I get the duality of Man concept, but what about catsap?
fire extinguisher horribly mispelled
Break in case of excessive “X’s”
I go for the cramel lattay.
Shopping cart reading "garbich"
Hey, that’s recyclabchle!
Smoke alarm reading "smork alam"
Smorksy the Bear says only you can prevent alam abuse.
Spinach container reading "spinch"
Better than the ickberg lettuce.
Sprinkles container reading "ranibow sprimkle"
I think that pizza shop went into the ice cream biz.
Chicken nuggets container labeled "chicken nutguts"
Is that a fancy word for its balls?
Oatmeal container labeled "oatmeat"
I KNEW those vegans were full of shit.
Soap dispenser labeled "hand soup"
You should try their face salad.
Sign reading "scarmmbled eggs"
They all look so good. One Jelly Ass, please.
Sign reading "no smorking"
And no shit, no service.
Sign reading "dumsticks & thighs"
The smartsticks are better.
sign reading chocolate mouse
It really is the tastiest mammal.
Sign reading "belssed"
When God punks you.
Paper towel dispenser labeled "napkings"
I guess the pandemic made it royalty.
Milk dispenser labeled "skin milk"
Try the brain shake!
Mashed potatoes with a sign labeled "marsh potao"
Tastes a bit swampy.